According to the basic foundation of social behavior, everything we do should be about constructive behavior. When it's about us, that's a lot easier to take care of. And while we don't have to go through the communication of that effort to someone else, we should still come up with a concrete plan.

If the feeling is misleading or an appropriate one is absent, reframing resolves the conflict. However, when that is not the case, we need to be specific. As with others, it is about an actionable request. Except, in this case, the burden of taking on that action is ours.

After coming up with a concrete response to pursue, we need to manifest it. At the very least, we should record it somewhere. Write it down. Make an audio message. Film a video. Whatever the choice, it is really important that we make the commitment by manifesting it.

Next, take it one step further and share the action with someone else. The more, the better. That can include telling them how to constructively support us but, regardless, putting ourselves out there makes it even more likely the change will happen at all. Peer pressure and peer support are very powerful motivators. Sometimes we are supposed to feel bad and that's a good thing, for it is the future desire to avoid that discomfort that can prevent us from engaging in the undesirable behavior in the first place until the desirable behavior becomes a habit.